Joel Campbell rejecting Arsenal
I think it says everything about what is going wrong at Arsenal when a 19-year-old Costa Rican player turns you down. Still, that hasn't stopped Wenger from making bids for 17-year-old Romelu Lukaku (who is incredible on Fifa) and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, who is, unsurprisingly, also 17. In other news, a bid for Phil Jagielka, who is, surprisingly, not a teenager, was rejected on the grounds that it was £2 million less than was offered last year. So clearly not a serious bid then.
Mohamed Bin Hammered
One-time Fifa Presidential candidate (he never made it to voting) Mohamed Bin Hammam has been found guilty of trying to bribe officials to vote for him. No, really?! Trying to prove his innocene, Hammam said that Fifa had it out for him and were going to find him guilty. So nothing to do with the fact that somebody took photos of money used to bribe the heads of Caribbean football. It was all just one big conspiracy. Admittedly, Jack Warner decided to quit so he could not be charged and Sepp Blatter is clearly incorruptible so there is no issue there (after all, friends of Robert Mugabe couldn't be evil). Let us hope that Mohamed is bin-bagged and sent back to Qatar and we never have to hear from him again. Once his appeal has failed that is.
Tevez not leaving
In the latest 'no shit Sherlock' moment, we found out that Carlos Tevez isn't going to Corinthians. Did not see that coming.
Manu boo hoo
This week Emmanuel Adebayor was sent to play with the reserves after not being selected for Manchester City's tour of the US. So he complained about it. Then he was told to train with the youth team. It's not like Roberto Mancini failed to understand what Manu was saying, as anyone who watched him as a pundit during the World Cup would acknowledge.
Adebayor had a great time at Real Madrid last season apparently. He just wants us all to know that. As he said, he's prepared to wait until August 31st to seal his dream move. He might as well wait until August 2045 because it's not going to happen, not that I want to be the one who tells him this.
You can just picture the scene now: August 31
(Adebayor is in his sitting room, holding a Ronaldo toy tightly and eyeing up the phone. In walks Garry Cook).
Adebayor: Ooh, ooh Garry, any news from Jose?
Cook: Sorry Manu, I've heard nothing.
Adebayor: But he will call, I know he will call, Jose won't let me down.
Cook: We've had an offer from Tottenham, We were hoping you would go to them and get paid £100,000 to sit on their bench and mope.
Adebayor: Spurs?! Even I managed to score against them.
Cook: Yes, but if you actually put some effort in when you play Arsenal and score against them for their biggest rivals, then you will piss them off even more.
Adebayor: The only team in white I will go to is Madrid. Now shush, I'm trying to listen to the phone in case Jose calls.
A tweet by Rory McIlroy
http://www.mobypicture.com/user/McIlroyRory/view/10169451
Northern Ireland the last couple of months must have been a great place to go out!
Hall of Lame
I was thinking about part-time bowlers taking wickets when I saw Mahendra Singh Dhoni trundle in during the first Test match, so this week, unfortunately, we have to revisit one of my least favourite wickets of all time. We may all dislike Ricky Ponting, but sometimes I wonder why he didn't become an all rounder.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=heWw_Tp5cf0
Still, it's nothing on Michael Vaughan bowling Sachin Tendulkar.
Cricket shining through
As if this Test match hasn't been good enough, it has been a glorious week for cricket watchers everywhere. For me, two matches in particular have stood out. The Hampshire v. Nottinghamshire match was a thriller, with 25 of the 36 wickets being taken by spinners and Notts falling 4 runs short of winning the match with 4 wickets remaining.
However, the Roses clash at Headingley was something else. Yorkshire were 48 for 8 in reply to Lancashire's 328 all out, but they rallied to make 239.
Then, amazingly they had Lancashire 33 for 3 at the close of play and 87 for 8 the next morning, but then they managed to make it to 194.
As if that wasn't dramatic enough, chasing 283 to win, Yorkshire were 177-8 before another ridiculous 9th wicket stand got them to 230-9, but eventually they lost by 23 runs.
So overall, the 9th wicket stands in the match were: 9, 154, 80 and 53. Not too bad.
The week ahead
Got to back the draw in the Test match tomorrow, but I'm not backing a Tendulkar hundred as I think he might struggle for time.
In other news, Tevez will say he prefers Liverpool to Manchester, Cesc Fabregas' accountant will say he's being robbed and Sir Alex Ferguson will accuse everyone from the FA to his postman of being against him.
Quote of the week/month/year/millennium
Guy Moussi, after signing a 3 year contract with Forest: "I don't want to be rude, but I could not have gone to Derby. It was impossible."
And what he actually meant: "I would never go and play for the sheep-shagging scum, baa baa."
I hope you saw that Kris Commons.
And in case you dislike Wales and want to gloat at them for being bottom seeds in the next Fifa qualifying tournament, then you should read this. This guy should be a national hero.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/wales/8635249/Meet-the-Faroese-student-who-made-Wales-officially-worse-at-football.html
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