Rio court case is a Cashley affair
It would be fair to say that shock of the week was not seeing Rio Ferdinand going to the High Court to sue the Mirror on Sunday for publishing a story that he had had an 8 year affair. Mr 'missed drugs test' himself may not have reached the levels of a Ryan Giggs, but he is notorious for his extra-marital affairs which have him on a par with Wayne Rooney. But instead of just ignoring the story, Ferdinand decided to sue the newspaper. Not because the story was false, but because it was a private manner, which of course, is now in every single newspaper and news outlet. You would think when it comes to privacy Rio would ask Giggs for a word or two as he would know that going to Court is the stupidest thing you can do when it comes to trying to keep an affair away from beocming big news. Ferdinand is obsessed with getting 'stay on your feet' into every part of his daily life now, but it is a shame that he didn't take the message to heart, as it might have saved him having to pay for lawyers, the Court and the Sunday Mirror when they win the case. Let's just be thankful that, with his memory, Ferdinand remembered to turn up to the Court.
Also this week we were told by none other than Ashley Cole, the man who cheated on his wife repeatedly and shot a work experience student with an air rifle, to judge him only on his football. After watching his performances last season, maybe he should be careful what he wishes for.
Mugabe blunder
In another great moment for Sepp Blatter, he decided to meet Robert Mugabe this week. I don't know what he was thinking, allowing himself to be pictured alongside that terrible dictator, the portrayor of all corruption and deceit, the runner of rigged elections and the man who would ruthlessly remove all enemies. Not that Mugabe is too great himself...
Haye's how you do it
As we try and forget about David Haye's awful attempt to knock out Wladimir Klitschko, the giant Ukranian decided to remind us that talk is cheap by putting up a video where he silently mocks the Hayemaker. As I continue the cliches, this proves that actions are louder than words and that Haye should learn to roll with the punches (ok I'll stop). The final attack at the end is truly a knockout hit for Haye, as a copy of the Daily Mail is used to compound his embarrassment. Bit of a low blow if you ask me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mH3IViJfK48
Sad day for Forest
The Forest Derby rivalry has been intense over the last few years, as former players and managers have traded sides and desperately tried to put one over each other. So it was a sad day to hear that chief Derby destroyer Robert Earnshaw has gone back to Cardiff instead of deciding to continue his exploits last year where he scored 3 times (including the winner at Pride Park). You might think with Billy Davies, Kris Commons and Robbie Savage all having left it would be a bit quieter next season but I wouldn't count on it. New Forest manager Schteve McClaren is a former Derby assistant manager and flag-waving extraordinaire Nathan Tyson has moved down the A5-2 to join the Rams, who probably still haven't forgiven him. As pre-season fixtures start to arrive and the countdown to the new campaign gets ever closer, I think we should look at the former Forest and Derby players in each other's ranks.
Forest
Lee Camp - saved penalty for us at Pride Park to earn controversial 1-1 draw (with help from Stuart Atwell)
Marcus Tudgay - scored twice for us in the 5-2 home win last season
Steve McClaren - see above
The Sheep
Nathan Tyson - see above
Nigel Clough - former Forest striker and, of course, son of the legendary Brian
Departures: Robert Earnshaw, Billy Davies, Kris Commons
In case any Forest fans out there need cheering up, here are a few Youtube videos I've just looked up: We start with my favourite ever match, the 1-1 draw at Pride Park. The footage is awful, but the commentary in the last minute or so more than makes up for it.
This is followed by the departing Earnshaw's winner at Pride Park and a compilation video of his goals, including the 3 against Derby and a hat-trick against Leicester City. The perfect way to enjoy your Sunday evening!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC3FQv4v6o8&feature=related - Derby 1-1 Forest
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gHknP-vQXE - Earnshaw at Pride Park
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLfeFW3nocc - Earnshaw goals
Women footballers follow the men
I've always believed there was something re-assuring about familiarity, but I wouldn't tell our women footballers that after losing on penalties in the World Cup quarter-finals. Now I know I may not have been as complimentary to women's sports as I could have been, although that is not to say I didn't enjoy watching the tennis in Birmingham and at Wimbledon. So I will avoid making remarks like the matches had to go on longer because they had to explain the offside rule, because they are unneccessary. Truth is, I enjoy watching women's football. I mean Bend it Like Beckham was a brilliant film after all.
RIP NOTW
Whether you approved of the News of the World's techniques in finding stories or not, you must admit it was pretty interesting to read. I personally will miss hearing about the Fake Sheik and what he managed to convince celebrities to say when they thought they were talking in private. In particular, the newspaper should have our thanks for outing the Pakistani cricketers who tried to ruin the sport. It is a shame they never nailed Sepp Blatter as well, then they could have tried to rescue two sports from corruption.
Plane to Spain
We've had the Arms Race, now footballers are seeing who can get the plane to Spain the fastest. Cesc Fabregas has been putting in a top effort for the last couple of years, whilst Carlos Tevez has made a late dash, although he may have to wait for his move. Rumours have been circulating about a big bid from Barcelona for Gareth Bale, but that would appear highly unlikely. It will be interesting to see which moaning footballer out of Fabregas and Tevez can get there first as players convince themselves that they will get into the Real Madrid and Barcelona teams. Tevez possibly could get in the Madrid team, but Cesc should be careful before rushing back to Catalunia. He may have won nothing at Arsenal, but at least he got on the pitch. Maybe he should talk to Javier Mascherano, who spent the whole season on the bench and only got to play when there were injuries, before deciding to leave.
Hall of Lame
If Rio is flop of the week, it would seem right to look back at some of his indiscretions. This week he was accused of having affairs with 10 women, he has had a number of one night stands, filmed himself having group sex in Cyprus and missed a drugs test because he went shopping. And in a continuation of this, he decided to send a direct message to journalist Oliver Holt recently, saying: "You fat prick. U got something to say about me missing a drugs test say it when u see me." And this was the England captain, who got replaced by John Terry. Lovely.
Also, as the News of the World is shutting down, we should remember the time Sven fell for the Fake Sheikh and said he would be tempted to join Aston Villa as manager and could bring David Beckham with him. Brilliant.
The week ahead
Golf, like tennis, decides to throw together a few majors at the same time, so only a few weeks after Rory McIlroy's triumph at Congressional, we are back in Britain for the British Open. Here are my predictions:
Winner: Graeme McDowell (sorry to jinx him)
Runner-up: Lee Westwood
Rory McIlroy performance: 65, 67, 81, 59 - ends 5th
Certainty to miss the cut: Phil Mickelson (has only one top 10 finish in this event)
Also this week, Liverpool will announce they are going to build a new stadium. Rumours are it will be sponsored by the History Channel.
Quotes of the week
Carlos Tevez: "My little toe is hurting, so I have to go to Spain."
Cesc Fabregas: "I miss eating good paella, so I must return to my homeland."
Harry Redknapp: "Luka Modric is not leaving no matter what."
Daniel Levy: "We will never sell Luka Modric."
Luka Modric: "Sod it, I'm off to Spain."
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