Monday
So, the cricket is having a week off, the golf is finished and the football hasn't started. Australian cricket took another blow as Shane Warne announced he was fully retired from cricket. So no comeback then? Here was me thinking he'd retired years ago.
James Pattinson is out of the rest of the tour with a stress fracture of the lower back. More good news for the Aussies then.
At least the darts continues to deliver, slightly making up for my first day without cricket in a good couple of months. I'm feeling weak typing this as we speak.
Tuesday
New Barcelona manager Gerardo Martino is appointed, prompting Accrington Stanley-esque claims of 'who is that?' Exactly.
Very little live sporting action but the transfer window is doing its best to make up for that. Arsenal supposedly put up a £40m + £1 bid for Luis Suarez which didn't exactly meet the Liverpool owner's approval. On top of this, not-at-all-biased-Real-Madrid-supporting newspaper Marca say Gareth Bale has agreed a six year deal. Clearly they don't realise that negotiating with Daniel Levy is about as enjoyable as opening the batting for Australia at the minute.
Wednesday
The only highlight of the day is a Bayern Munich v. Barcelona friendly which the Bavarians won 2-0. Other than that, the main stories are: Luis Suarez is not for sale, Wayne Rooney is not for sale. The only other incident of note is David Warner smashing the South African A bowling attack around the park. At least he did a better job of that than hitting opponents. Looks all set for him to slot in to the Australian side next week. But guessing that batting line-up is like guessing what midfield Bayern Munich put out in any one week. Getting the top six in correct order is a tough ask.
Thursday
An historic day for Nottingham Forest with not one but two big name signings in Jamie Mackie and Djamel Abdoun. Maybe I shouldn't put Forest and historic in the same sentence
A nice story today (it really has been a slow week) came from Cristiano Ronaldo who travelled to Galicia to donate blood for victims of a big train accident.
Interesting that once more Roger Federer lost to a player not in the top 50 after defeat to Daniel Brands. I know he's trying a new racquet but it's not looking so good at the moment.
Friday
Apart from pre-season friendlies the only story was a certain Usain Bolt who won again. That was pretty much it, although watching Graeme White wheel away for Notts against Yorkshire was most delightful. In Sri Lanka Thisara Perera took a Robin Peterson (with help from a wide) for 35 runs.
Saturday
More British success in the athletics from Farah and Ohu... Ohu... umm yeah her. Another great British sporting success in Nile Ranger showed off something else, a new tattoo. Maybe he's looking for a move to the Scottish Second Division, or League Two or whatever they call it now http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/5037053/Nile-Rangers-bizarre-new-tattoo.html
In the arrers, MVG and Adrian Lewis played an absolute blinder, with Jackpot Lewis winning 17-15. He will play The Power in the final after he beat a dogged James Wade with the highest average of the tournament.
At the same time, Bayern Munich and Dortmund were reminding us all of their sexy football in the German Super Cup with a 4-2 win for Dortmund. More please.
A special mention to the GB 4x100m team for dropping the baton. Again. Must admire their consistency
Sunday
A hundred for James Taylor as he gets re-selected for the England squad for the Third Test at Old Trafford. How the Aussies would love him in their squad.
Performance of the day has to be Phil Taylor who averaged 111 against Adrian Lewis in the World Matchplay final. For people who don't like darts, that is a staggering average.
In the Senior Open, Bernhard Langer double bogeyed the last hole to end up in a play-off and Lewis Hamilton won his first grand prix with Mercedes.
Oblivious to all of that, the top stories focused on Gareth Bale. Still, at least we can ignore the rumours soon and say hello to live football next weekend. And Jim White jumping out of helicopters or whatever it is Sky have planned.
Meanwhile...
Tweet of the Week: @John_W_Henry - 'What do you think they're smoking over there at Emirates?'
Probably the funniest reason to get arrested by a professional sportsman I've ever heard - http://news.sky.com/story/1119149/us-footballer-jailed-after-barking-at-police-dog
So Papiss Cisse won't have Wonga on his shirt but will instead visit a casino. Papiss Cisse is caught. Papiss Cisse will now wear Wonga on his shirt. Funny that
Never mind Haye-Fury or Froch-Groves, if you want a good fight then check out a bit of badminton - http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/general/others/badminton-bizarre-fight-breaks-out-between-london-2012-partners-at-the-canada-open-8726659.html
Hunter Mahan leads by two shots in the Canadian Open after two rounds before withdrawing after his wife went into labour. Brandt Snedeker ends up winning the tournament and promises to buy Mahan's daughter a gift with some of the $1million prize fund he earned. I think that's called rubbing it in.
Sport this week
The small matter of the return of the Football League, the Bridgestone Invitational and Third Ashes Test at Old Trafford. Not too bad.
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