Boxing Day madness
I thought I’d mention Forest
first so people that don’t care about cricket can ignore the rest (but please
read it anyway). Typical Lamy that I tweet about how good my day has been and I
can’t wait to relax and watch Lord of the Rings and just as the film starts I
find out Sean O’Driscoll has been sacked. So now that I’ve eaten (like Andy
Reid I need good feeding before work) it’s time to give my opinion about
everything that’s gone on so I can catch the battle of Helms Deep.
I’ll put it out there (wahey) and say I never wanted Steve
Cotterill sacked and I thought his achievements in keeping us up were
underrated. I didn’t want O’Driscoll in because I wasn’t that impressed by his
managerial record and I didn’t see him as a step-up. I’ve watched Forest play rubbish most of the season and despaired at how
boring our football was and how poor our defence has been. But I’ve never
wanted the manager sacked. If Leeds had kept
playing while 1-0 up today and won, the clamour to sack O’Driscoll would have
been fairly high, but I still wouldn’t have wanted him sacked. I felt he should
have been given another transfer window and the rest of the season at least to
try and get a team put together.
Sacking a manager after a good win always seems bizarre to
outsiders and I can see why. Anyone who watched us tear Leeds
apart during the second-half would have been shocked to think the manager could
be under pressure and considering we are just outside the play-offs I can
understand why.
In some ways it’s good that the owners sacked O’Driscoll before the
transfer window and not after he was allowed to buy players, but it seems
strange that Abdulaziz Al Hasawi said today: “We will be led by the manager – if he wants to bring players
in we will try to help him.” He then stated
after the sacking: “Sometimes those changes need to be made from a
position of strength rather than weakness and that is what we are trying to
do.” As this was his first Forest
match either he came in especially to be there for the sacking and lied about O’Driscoll
or the decision was made afterwards. If it’s the former then it makes no sense
because the only reason to get rid of him was if somebody had already been lined up. If
it’s the latter then clearly he wasn’t watching the second-half.
The new owners talked about appointing an “iconic” manager
when they first arrived which made it bizarre they went with O’Driscoll. But
having talked about giving him plenty of time to build a club it’s just stupid
to sack him now. Saying they want a manager with plenty of Premier League
experience is also a bit stupid (yes I sound like a little kid but nevermind). For a start we need to get out of the
Championship and how many good managers are there who are out of work now? And
if we appoint a proven Premier League manager they will probably want to spend
big money which could lead to a QPR situation. And let’s not forget what
happened when we appointed Steve McClaren.
I’m not going to mourn O’Driscoll going, but worse than that
is I’ve lost a lot of trust with the owners. They had done nothing wrong until now: saving the club, talking lots of sense and backing their man. But now, all the
positivity around the club will be hit by this. We will have a new manager and
we have loan players who might not want to sign for us. And it’s all my bloody
fault for tweeting.
Raymundo, who could be the
new man?
So we’re going to get “an ambitious manager with Premier
League experience.” Who could this bet? Lambrokes is here with the latest odds:
Sven Goran Eriksson – 7/1
Mark Hughes – 8/1
Alan Curbishley – 9/1
Alex McLeish – 10/1
Glenn Hoddle – 12/1
Roberto di Matteo – 14/1
Avram Grant – 15/1
Phil Scolari (doesn’t matter he is managing Brazil he is a Forest
fan) – 20/1
Jose Mourinho (as has been pointed out to me he might soon be
on the market) – 50/1
Steve Kean – 70/1
Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink – 100/1
Stuart Broad – 150/1
Beach ball – 250/1
Lee Westwood – 300/1
The Sky Sports screen Gary Neville uses on Monday Night
Football – 450/1
Steve McClaren – 700/1
Ali Dia – 800/1
Eowyn from Lord of the Rings (sorry but she’s on screen now
and looks quite feisty) – 1000/1
Why Test cricket is
so good
This winter has been host to some unbelievable Test cricket,
with England winning in India , South
Africa winning in Australia ,
New Zealand drawing in Sri Lanka and the West Indies winning in Bangladesh . The
simple reason why Test cricket is the best thing ever created is because while
in India you can see a match
where a team scores 200 in a day on some filthy, slow, low-bouncing track, in Australia 200
can be scored in just over a session with batsmen smashing bowlers everywhere
on fast, bouncy wickets. In India
you can get two spinners bowling in tandem all day and opening the bowling. In Australia you
can get four seamers rotating during the day and the spinner maybe bowling five
overs.
Having feasted on some early morning sessions watching the
cricket, I thought I’d give my alternative rankings for England during
their series and then add some awards from the year.
Rankings:
0 – Kesteven
1 – Horrendous
2 – Shocker
3 – Why always me?
4 – Liability
5 – Distinctly average
6 – Pretty, pretty, pretty… pretty good
7 – Gary Neville orgasm
8 – Shares in Kleenex have doubled
9 – Needs boning right now
10 – Babies were born on the back of his performances
Alastair Cook – 9
Three matches, three hundreds and then the run-out of Dhoni
when he was on 99. His hundred in the second innings of the first Test showed
the rest of the team that it was possible to bat on these pitches. Had a lot of
luck getting his hundreds with lbw decisions but was unlucky in the final Test
with two shockers. Was a little defensive with his fields but his bowling
changes were good.
Nick Compton – 6
Steady, average, bang tidy. Helped Cook get the innings off
to good starts without doing anything spectacular. Will need to do more to justify his
place. A strike-rate of just under 34 shows Test cricket at its absolute
finest.
Jonathan Trott – 7
Anonymous for the first two Tests but scored well in the
final two albeit he was fortuitous not to be given out early in his
match-saving innings. His celebrations at slip were definitely a tour
highlight.
Kevin Pietersen – 8
Does his usual thing of one great innings but if all batsmen
did that then you’d be thrilled. His dismissal in his final innings – leaving a
straight ball from Jadeja – caused a lot broken items in my household but I’ve
let him off now.
Ian Bell – 6
Finished with an average of 43 after his final innings but
until then he’d showed why he was one of the worst sub-continent players in
English history. So frustrating but his cover drive is something of a rare
beauty and going by my rankings could be a 10 on its own.
Jonny Bairstow – 4
Wrongly given out in his only innings so hard to fault him
but adds to the welcome list of England
cricketers who come from Yorkshire.
Matt Prior – 8
A series of good scores without ever making a match
defining knock. His keeping also slipped a little in the third Test but still another
excellent tour. Continues his great success ever since Allen Stanford was not
around to hit on his wife.
Samit Patel – 4
Scored 69 runs and conceded 135 for one wicket. In the team
for the wrong reasons and despite getting starts never kicked on. Most
memorable contributions were the run-out of Sehwag and being the butt of a
David Lloyd joke about lamb curry.
Joe Root – 8
A high rating for somebody who only came in at the end but
for his 73 runs in the first innings when it looked like it was all going Pete
Tong was vital. Has been earmarked for Test cricket probably before he was
actually born but showed why here.
Graeme Swann – 9
Started the series by getting rid of pretty much the entire
Indian top order and continued his brilliance throughout. Showed his capability
with the bat which has sadly gone missing recently with an entertaining half
century.
Monty Panesar – 8
New celebration but same old Monster. Shockingly left out
for the first Test, the most one-dimensional English cricket (and the complete
antithesis of Fletcher favourite Ashley Giles) came back to haunt the man who
once omitted him against the Aussies Down Under with lots of wickets and tight
bowling.
Jimmy Anderson – 9
The difference between the two sides according to Dhoni, the
Burnley Express can now call Tendulkar his bitch after now having him out nine
times in Tests, the most out of any bowler in Test matches. His average of 30 may be higher
than the spinners, but having bowled on the seamers’ graveyard in the first
Test that is a considerable effort.
Steven Finn – 7
Disappointingly injured for three of the four matches but
showed his worth in the one Test that he played. Hopefully his injury problems
subside.
Tim Bresnan – 3
Another member of the Yorkshire
crew but sadly his winning touch has deserted him. Lacked pace and took no
wickets whilst his batting prowess was not on show either with just 39 runs in
three innings. Might have played his final Test.
Stuart Broad – 2
Bowled just two maidens out of 36 and went at 4.36 runs an
over. Probably injured so it’s hard to be too cruel, but his rating was doubled
because he is a Forest fan.
Other cricketers
Some other people have caught the eye this year:
AB De Villiers –
Went from 33 off 220 balls to help save a Test match (without scoring a single
boundary) to then blasting 169 off 184 balls to help win the same series Down
Under. His destruction of Dale Steyn in the IPL was so good I could not believe it.
Hashim Amla –
Triple hundred in England
and 196 in Australia .
Not too shabby for the man who has his hair on the wrong part of his face.
Michael Clarke – Averaged
106 in 10 matches with the small matter of four double hundreds in one year.
Chris Gayle –
Continued to smash bowling attacks all around the world and helped his country
win the World Twenty20. Great Gangnam Style as well.
Shiv Chanderpaul –
Averaged just under 99 after taking Australia
and England
for plenty of runs.
Rangana Herath –
Top wicket taker in Tests with 60 so far and another match still to go.
Dale Steyn –
Turned it on to destroy England
and the Aussies. Still the number one pace bowler in the world.
Comeback of the year
1. Marlon Samuels –
The one-man President of the Nasser Hussain fan club returned to the
international scene having previously been banned for an illegal action and he
showed himself to be a world-class batsman. Averaged in the 90s in England and Bangladesh
as well as 67 against New
Zealand in his only three series. Saved his
best for the World Twenty20 final though, scoring 78 off 56 balls (with 6
sixes) when his side were in trouble and then bowled his four overs at the cost
of 15 runs with a wicket as well.
2. Tino Best –
Best known for his searing pace and being on the end of an Andrew Flintoff
sledge, big Tino nearly became the first number 11 in history to score a Test
match hundred before getting out on 95. Saved his best for the tour of Bangladesh
which is not normally easy for the pacemen as he ended his year with a bowling
average of under 17.
3. Ben Hilfenhaus –
The most one-dimensional seamer in history showed his form in the West Indies and ended the year with 37 wickets at an
average of under 22. Might come under pressure for his place though with so
many options available to Australia .
Newcomer of the year
1. Sunil Narine - Came
into the West Indies one-day side right at the end of 2011 and ends 2012 as one
of the top three limited-overs bowlers in the world after impressing for his
country and in the IPL. Will need to keep adapting though now that he is no
longer an unknown quantity.
2. Cheteshwar Pujara
– After three unsuccessful Tests in 2010, the new Indian number three
showed why he is the new Rahul Dravid with an average of 72 against India and 87.6 against England.
3. Mitchell Starc – Another
who started right at the end of 2011 but only proved themselves this year. Quick,
left-handed, swings the ball in at pace and an able aggressive batsman, he is
basically just a better version of Mitchell Johnson. Raw but has lots of
potential, Aussie fans will hope he is not the new Johnson.
And a special mention
goes to…
Imran Tahir, who recorded the worst Test figures ever of
0-260 for South Africa
against Australia .
Even better, he thought he had a wicket and cupped his hand to his ear to bate
the ground only to then find out he had bowled a no-ball. I try to be funny but
the writer of this article goes on to a whole new level which I can only dream
of http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/sport/cricket/imran-tahirs-figures-the-worst-in-the-history-of-test-cricket/story-e6frey50-1226523791071
A sub-heading of: Cricket’s had Imran Khan, now meet Imran
can’t, was inspired, as was the poll on the site asking who was the worse
bowler, Tahir or former Prime Minister John Howard. Brilliant.
Three events I can’t
wait to watch
1. The Ashes in England
2. The Ashes in Australia
3. Wimbledon
My top 5 commentators
getting too excited
1. Ray Hudson - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4BAD-wjLsM
2. Gary Neville - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6RG6yxgeFE
3. Martin Tyler - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRrXuObdeds
4. Mark Bright (listen closely) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOqZ43uzNGw
5. Danny Morrison - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCcNSmP-OXQ
My top 10 moments of
2012
Ok we get it, 2012 was incredible as I predicted in my blogs
a while back. However, Sports Personality of the Year bored me to death. Too
much attention was put on sports which I didn't care about and not enough on the stuff
which got me really excited and out of my seat. Knowing that I’ve probably
missed off a couple of things here, this is my personal top 10, the moments I
will still be talking about in years to come.
1. Europe winning the Ryder
Cup on the final day (Poulter should have won SPOTY)
2. Leeds 3-7 Nottingham Forest (Ok I will actually stop
mentioning it now, but considering how bad our year has been you can’t blame me
for going on and on and on…)
3. England
winning a Test series in India
4. Olympics Super Saturday (Incredible, I mean, since when
does a ginger win anything?)
5. Balotelli – Why Always Me?
6. Balotelli – Top off, folded arms celebration against Germany
7. Agueroooooooooooo
8. England
smashing the All Blacks at Twickenham
9. Andy Murray winning the US Open
10. I know it’s cheating, but I couldn’t think of a worthy
number 10 so I’m going for Poulter’s five birdies in a row on the Saturday of
the Ryder Cup to give Europe a chance
My top 10
celebrations
With the African Cup of Nations returning once again in
January, why not celebrate this unheralded tournament then by celebrating some
erm celebrations. Africans have a history of great dance moves after scoring
goals and although none make the list here (unfortunately no room for Roger
Milla and those who have perfected the back-flips as well as Benjano) let us embrace in these
moments of beauty where a sportsman (or manager) has let out his emotions at
the scoring of a goal or the winning of a match. Without doubt my favourite
thing about sport:
1. Few people hog
the headlines like Mario Balotelli and few can match his celebrations. Even if
you are a Manchester United fan or just don’t like City, you must have found it
hard not to laugh at this precious moment.
2. Not many lists
have the same person in the top two spots but if the “Why Always Me?” t-shirt
wasn’t enough, Balotelli almost (but not quite) surpassed it with his slightly
ridiculous yet hilarious celebration against Germany in the Euro 2012
semi-finals when he took his top off and folded his arms across his chest. Few
celebrations have made way for so many memes than this one.
3. Beating your
biggest rivals at their ground in front of 90,000 of their fans and at the same
time winning your side the league title is pretty special. Now when you’re at
home in front of your own supporters you’re entitled to go mental, but it does
get any better than telling the Nou Camp to quieten down after destroying their
side’s title hopes? Cristiano Ronaldo’s celebration here is perfect for when
you score against someone on Fifa after they’ve been giving you loads of chat
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONq7xkSss1M
4. I am no Jose
Mourinho fan, but does it get much better than running down the touch-line at
Old Trafford after your team knock Manchester United out of the Champions
League? Or how about sliding on your knees after your team score the winner?
For these moments Mourinho gets in at 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqOfQlPbbys
5. You win the
Ashes in Australia
for the first time in 24 years. So how do you rub it in? By getting the whole
team to do the sprinkler in front of the Barmy Army in an otherwise empty
ground. It was impossible to go to a club and not see the sprinkler in action
for a period afterwards
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVUCiWDLavY
6. In the recent
Premier League poll for the best celebration in its 20 year history, my vote
went to Temuri Ketsbaia. Most people are happy when they score a goal, but
kicking angrily at an advertising board is something else. Priceless from
Ketsbaia
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlqCCDh9XT0
7. If Ronaldo
showed how to celebrate a big goal away from home, nobody epitomises the pure
ecstasy of scoring than Ryan Giggs, who showed that running around swirling
your shirt over the top of your head could be sexy. The chest hair made it even
more iconic
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quI_LkMj4HI
8. No England
cricketer has been so inept at fielding and yet so loved than Monty Panesar.
Dropped catches were the standard for Monty and every run scored was greeted
with big cheers. But give him a cricket ball in his hand and he suddenly
transforms. Getting his hero Sachin Tendulkar as his first Test wicket gave
birth to the running, high-fiving celebration sensation that inspired the
public and made the spinner a cult hero. However, it is this beauty in the
recent tour to India
which gets my vote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gq1Ydn0-aSg
9. Jimmy Bullard
was pure class when he copied the finger-wagging celebration of his manager
Phil Brown. A shame it didn’t stop them from getting relegated
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSlNGZKAg-4
10. Happy Gilmore
showed that riding various objects like a rocking bull could be funny, and no
golfer has showed that more than Boo Weekley, who stoke the 2008 Ryder Cup at
Valhalla by mimicking the celebration
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_tMOE4-tKc
